a typical blog entry
hmm, i mentioned a few days ago that i would write about the whole a level experience and so i finally found time to do it.
the A levels is just like a shadow. you see it looming over you and its immaterial. youre scared of it and at the same time you cant run away. and then after it starts and then passes through, you feel as though it was nothing at all. not easy or monumentally difficult---the feeling is just that you've mugged so hard for something thats over before you know it and your life is once again empty.
for the guys, i guess this strange but joyous feeling will last for about 2 years, after which its back to the books again.
its funny but everybody thinks that the moment your last paper ends and you walk out of the hall, you'll scream in joy in all that shit. the actual truth is that you open the last paper and think "aiyah fuck la, sian ah, last paper liao, dont feel like doing"
and then you throw such detrimental thoughts aside and put your pen down and start grinding away. time flows and the pen ink runs onto the paper almost automatically, pro war stances, anti war stances, war dehumanizes, war illuminates blah blah.
you finish the first question and theres still the second one to go and 1 and a half hours left to kill. you imagine yourself finishing the paper and grinning like a maniac. the reality is far from that and you think to yourself "ill soon be seeing myself celebrating" and right at that exact moment, you wonder if you could just put your pen down and hand up half an exam paper.
your rational self strikes you again and you pick up the damn pen and start writing again. its almost like giving birth. push push, breathe, push push.
the final elation occurs when you are writing your last paragraph. yes guys (and gals), the elation begins when you are almost finished. i suppose that this is only logical cos after you finish it, you experience bathos, or an anticlimax of emotion. you feel.....fuck, you feel flat, when everything in the world says that you should be the happiest person on Earth.
it is pretty strange huh. just something i noticed and that people around me confirmed. theres nothing like anticipation to rev up your engine.
looking back, i cant really remember what the a levels were like. it was like part of ben's house, jianwei';s house , joseph's reading room, the school, movies, soccer and gym all rolled into one.
its like colin mcrae, winning eleven and GTA and a blur of field soccer. somehow there seems to be less memories of studying , which i think i will pay for once the results come back. damn, its gonna suck real bad and i say this not becos eventually my results will magically become AAA and people will think i am some smartass but from someone who has never passed a single econs test in his time at acjc and didnt know what the fuck he was writing on his exam paper.
but still, that aint gonna destroy my holidays, which i find pretty fulfilling right now. am doing all the things i wanted to do and its been pretty good. simple but good and i dont think i would have it any other way.
NS is coming soon. i found out that Mok is on the same day as me haha sow e might be in same platoon or company!!! (for your info, mok is in same reporting time as alex the white horse so good for you mok!)
i am currently trying out the new endurance formula that i purchased. Its from GNC and its called Endurox. supposed to boost muscle recovery and energy retention. we shall see if it stands up to my schedule and the fact that i am injured all over the body due to my playing style for soccer.
haha, looks like this is a typical blog entry. i fucking hate blog entries like this cos it implies the person writing it wants you to know about his life and also the fact that he has nothing better to talk about shows through. its like, who the hell wants to know that i bought Endurox??!!
well, thats what 4 hours in the sun does to your brain. you cant think. and you certainly damn well cant write properly. i actually has this idea for a metaphorical description of an MRT tunnel and its reflections on life but i cant remember what i was going to write. so too bad. everyone has off days and this is one of mine.
the A levels is just like a shadow. you see it looming over you and its immaterial. youre scared of it and at the same time you cant run away. and then after it starts and then passes through, you feel as though it was nothing at all. not easy or monumentally difficult---the feeling is just that you've mugged so hard for something thats over before you know it and your life is once again empty.
for the guys, i guess this strange but joyous feeling will last for about 2 years, after which its back to the books again.
its funny but everybody thinks that the moment your last paper ends and you walk out of the hall, you'll scream in joy in all that shit. the actual truth is that you open the last paper and think "aiyah fuck la, sian ah, last paper liao, dont feel like doing"
and then you throw such detrimental thoughts aside and put your pen down and start grinding away. time flows and the pen ink runs onto the paper almost automatically, pro war stances, anti war stances, war dehumanizes, war illuminates blah blah.
you finish the first question and theres still the second one to go and 1 and a half hours left to kill. you imagine yourself finishing the paper and grinning like a maniac. the reality is far from that and you think to yourself "ill soon be seeing myself celebrating" and right at that exact moment, you wonder if you could just put your pen down and hand up half an exam paper.
your rational self strikes you again and you pick up the damn pen and start writing again. its almost like giving birth. push push, breathe, push push.
the final elation occurs when you are writing your last paragraph. yes guys (and gals), the elation begins when you are almost finished. i suppose that this is only logical cos after you finish it, you experience bathos, or an anticlimax of emotion. you feel.....fuck, you feel flat, when everything in the world says that you should be the happiest person on Earth.
it is pretty strange huh. just something i noticed and that people around me confirmed. theres nothing like anticipation to rev up your engine.
looking back, i cant really remember what the a levels were like. it was like part of ben's house, jianwei';s house , joseph's reading room, the school, movies, soccer and gym all rolled into one.
its like colin mcrae, winning eleven and GTA and a blur of field soccer. somehow there seems to be less memories of studying , which i think i will pay for once the results come back. damn, its gonna suck real bad and i say this not becos eventually my results will magically become AAA and people will think i am some smartass but from someone who has never passed a single econs test in his time at acjc and didnt know what the fuck he was writing on his exam paper.
but still, that aint gonna destroy my holidays, which i find pretty fulfilling right now. am doing all the things i wanted to do and its been pretty good. simple but good and i dont think i would have it any other way.
NS is coming soon. i found out that Mok is on the same day as me haha sow e might be in same platoon or company!!! (for your info, mok is in same reporting time as alex the white horse so good for you mok!)
i am currently trying out the new endurance formula that i purchased. Its from GNC and its called Endurox. supposed to boost muscle recovery and energy retention. we shall see if it stands up to my schedule and the fact that i am injured all over the body due to my playing style for soccer.
haha, looks like this is a typical blog entry. i fucking hate blog entries like this cos it implies the person writing it wants you to know about his life and also the fact that he has nothing better to talk about shows through. its like, who the hell wants to know that i bought Endurox??!!
well, thats what 4 hours in the sun does to your brain. you cant think. and you certainly damn well cant write properly. i actually has this idea for a metaphorical description of an MRT tunnel and its reflections on life but i cant remember what i was going to write. so too bad. everyone has off days and this is one of mine.
posted by tim tay at 6:44 PM
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